ARE YOU TRYING TO HARD?
You’re investing a lot of effort, practicing your Mindgasm exercises as frequently as possible. You’re truly dedicated to making it happen, with a clear goal in mind and putting significant work into achieving it. But, despite all this hard work, a Mindgasm still seems out of reach. Have you ever considered that this might be precisely the issue: You’re trying too hard?
1. THE “LAW OF REVERSED EFFORT”
The Law of Reversed Effort, a principle deeply rooted in the insights of thinkers such as Aldous Huxley and psychologists like Alan Watts, offers profound insight into this dilemma. It posits that in certain scenarios, the more intensely we strive to achieve something, the less likely we are to attain it. This principle is not just theoretical; it’s evident in many aspects of daily life:
- The more we try to fall asleep, the more awake and alert we become.
- The more obsessively we focus on wealth as a measure of success, the poorer we may feel, irrespective of our actual financial situation.
- The more we attempt to suppress or fight our anxious thoughts, the stronger and more persistent they become.
- Ever noticed how trying too hard to be liked or make a good impression can sometimes lead to awkwardness or even disapproval?
This concept encourages a reevaluation of how we approach our ambitions and objectives, advocating for a more relaxed and effortless attitude in situations where we might typically apply more force or control.
"The harder we try with the conscious will to do something, the less we shall succeed."
2. SHIFTING PERSPECTIVE
First off, understand that everything is okay just the way it is. There’s no single right way to do things. It’s important not to worry too much about the end result or how exactly to get there.
Adopting a broader perspective can significantly change your approach. Consider how a small child feels when they want something badly—it seems like their world will fall apart if they don’t get it right now. However, from an adult’s vantage point, you understand this is just a fleeting moment. You’ve been through similar situations and know that, despite the current feelings of desperation, there are various possible outcomes.
When we zoom out and consider our experiences from a wider angle, we understand that facing challenges is normal. These moments are part of your unique path toward Mindgasm. Life’s circumstances vary for everyone. Someone who’s just had the chance to unwind at a meditation retreat or on a leisurely vacation might find it easier to achieve a Mindgasm than someone who is currently navigating through a particularly demanding work phase.
In essence, there’s no universal roadmap to experiencing a Mindgasm. It’s an intensely personal expedition, with each individual carving out their own unique path and life circumstances.
3. SUPERCOMPENSATION
In sports, there’s this idea called supercompensation. It means that after you work out and rest, your body doesn’t just go back to how strong it was before; it gets even stronger to be better prepared for future challenges.
This idea can be applied to Mindgasm too. A deliberate break might just be what’s needed for all the practices and experiences to deeply integrate into your body’s long-term memory, making it easier and more natural to apply what you’ve learned in your next Mindgasm session.
The journey to Mindgasm can also be likened to learning how to play an instrument. You start with the basics and gradually improve. However, if you’re a beginner aiming to play Mozart right away, you’re likely to end up feeling frustrated. Think of your body as the instrument. Playing with your body’s energies and feelings creates the music.
The more freely you allow your energy to move, the smoother the experience becomes. But, trying to control it too much can make things increasingly difficult.
This process takes time. Enjoy where you are at the moment. A Mindgasm slowly builds up over time, which is what makes its intensity so incredible. It comes to you when you are ready.
4. LETTING GO
"Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone."
“Letting go” or even “letting more go” seems key to achieving a Mindgasm. Yet, this is where the crux of the “Law of Reversed Effort” lies. The more I strive to let go, the harder it becomes.
Does this mean I maybe should take a break from Mindgasm if I don’t make any progress?
There’s no straightforward answer to this. However, it’s definitely worthwhile to reassess your approach by adopting new perspectives or embracing the benefits of strategic breaks, much like the supercompensation concept in sport.
Here are some approaches that can help you let go more effectively in the long run:
Do nothing
It might sound odd, but sometimes doing nothing can lead to significant change. This doesn’t mean just lounging around and mindlessly scrolling through social media or binge-watching Netflix. It’s about taking a step back to observe. Pay attention to the things in your life that might be pulling you away from your Mindgasm practice and slowing down your progress.
Many people avoid doing nothing because they dislike feeling bored. However, they fail to recognize the valuable lessons and insights that profound boredom can provide when embraced properly. For more on this topic, take a look at our blog post: Harnessing the power of boredom
Rewiring your brain
It might be time to rewire your brain. If you’re entrenched in habitual patterns, consider engaging in activities or dietary changes that promote mental flexibility, as detailed in our “Rewiring” blog post.
Get rid of blockages
When you take time to observe, you’ll also notice those pesky tasks you’ve been successfully putting off time and again. Can you imagine how difficult it is to fully let go in a Mindgasm session when you have things hanging over your head that constantly occupy your thoughts? Consider a challenge, a “I Do What I Don’t Want to Do Day,” where you focus on ticking off that entire annoying to-do list. With the liberating feeling that follows, your Mindgasm practice is sure to benefit.
Setting the stage
Perhaps consider a new approach to preparing for your next Mindgasm session. The “Setting the Stage” blog article offers useful insights on how to transform your next session into a personal ritual for a truly elevated experience.
5. CONCLUSION
In navigating the journey to experiencing a Mindgasm, the Law of Reversed Effort teaches us a valuable lesson: the path to pleasure and mindfulness isn’t about exerting more force, but rather about embracing ease and patience. Taking time to reflect and observe can be a powerful tool in breaking free from distracting habits that may be blocking your progress. Not achieving a Mindgasm right away isn’t a catastrophe. Just as a child learns to cope with not getting what they want immediately.
Trust that you are exactly where you need to be on your journey. Have faith in your own growth, and allow the experience of your individual Mindgasm to unfold in its own time and natural way.
Trust me, I know what I'm doing.
